Nevermind I Am Behind.

Do you ever feel really behind?  Not just on cleaning and laundry and dishes, but on life.

Max and I have been feeling that.  Our dreams and aspirations stare blankly at us. From miles and miles away.

It's really [frightfully] easy to get carried away with hopes and plans for the future, wish lists and to-dos.

I've been taking a deeper look at the effect of a life focused on the empty portion of the glass.  In my own life I've spotted some seeds of comparison that have bloomed into negativity and doubt.  And let me tell you, they are some UGLY plants.  I've come to the conclusion that it is of little importance how much you make, if you are married, have kids, or live in Europe.  There is still a stack sky-high of little notes scribbled with things we have yet to achieve.  When I step back and look at this discovery that I've made, I see how obvious it is.  Most people would agree, but to confess there is that stack in our own hearts?  There is a great task required, and many ways to approach it.  My method of choice?  Throw them in the air and do a boogie.

So the other night as we were going to bed, Max and I decided to play a game called "thankfulness".  We went back and forth saying both little and big things we are blessed with.  My favorite was my last one as I was drifting off to sleep, "I'm thankful that I don't have a third eye".  Yet even after that disturbing mental image, I slept so soundly.

There is a lovely little song by Brooke Waggoner.  In my years dreaming of the love yet to come, I listened to it a lot.  Now that I have found love, I still listen to it frequently.  It's true stuff.

"I am behind
I am behind
And nevermind
I will not pine
For I am mine"